You are currently browsing the monthly archive for July, 2008.
tired. frustrated. worn out. Don’t forget stressed. LIFE is sucking the life out of me. On saturday I plan to spend alone time. Really wanna watch dark knight – ALONE. But what will most probably happen is I’ll stay home and finish up homework I’ve been missing out on the weekend.
Been targeted at multiple times this week to not committed to totally off today but the comments really just fly past me. I’m just SO mentally drained with council, tail thing and trying to get decent grades.
GOSH.
I just wanna sleep but somehow I manage to keep telling myself I’m not doing enough, I’M NOT.
Exams. Im not gonna state ALL my results but the things that really bother me a lot are S (tamil). A Levels are this year! I need to get tution NOW!!! S (history) I need to pass history even if it means doign a ton of essays. S (maths) Even if its H1, its important. It can help me in my promos.
You are human and you should stop pretending you’re not. You can be hurt, things affect you. STOP RUNNING. You are who you are FACE IT. This is your life. You got yourself here. You made these decisions to end up here so deal. You can carry on this way of living just floating by pretending that you’re in control in whatever dellusional universe. Live it. Hate it. Love it. Your choice. Your life. Your rules. But sometimes you have to realize that you have to go through something to come out stronger on the other side. You need to grow. You can’t evade this forever. Sooner or later it will catch up with you. STOP RUNNING/WALKING/DODGING/HIDING. DEAL Because at the end of the day even if its only one, ONE person at least believes YOU are bigger than this. I do too.
Spent the night at geralds. I think my ear’s affected. Wanna bash her com in cause its so DAMN slow. Will blog later. Just wanted to say that whoever made the 2005 movie Roll-bounce was pure genius pure genius.
Nope, not the familiar rhyme but my man, ahem excuse the pun GEORGE MICHAEL. He used to belong to the famous pop group of the 80’s WHAM!. The greatest but like they say pictures speak a 1000 words. Enjoy.
Now if I could just lean over and touch that blue butt thing it would be the happiest day of my life.
Right. I always wear this hawaiian shirt wothout buttoning it at all. SEXAYE.
OOh. He’s finnaly getting his mate to check him out.
When asked the famous question of are you gay? His reaction, WHO ME? What a shocker!
Yes and you’ll always be number one in our hearts michael. BUT seriously ridiculous (as his ultra mini shorts might be) he was always one to put a smile on my face.
After all he turned out pretty good. Gay but good.
I realize this is my 3rd post of the day all of which are worlds apart. But I guess how can I be priscy and not have one good solid post about old music? Alright nostalgia here I come.
First has to be my favourite.
MR GLEN CAMPBELL a.k.a country music superstar. He sang great hits like country boy, Oklahoma Sunday morning, gentle on my mind. But what really blew me away was the fact that he turned christian and he started singing really soulful country style christian music. It could be a song about brokenness and just not feeling good enough and yet in that mess he managed to find the words to praise God. I remember my dad used to dance with me to him. Back when I was daddy’s little girl. He used to let me step on his toes to dance cause I wasn’t tall enough.
Next.
MR JOHN DENVER. He died in a jetplane crash when he was I don’t know really young. But he sang great country songs too. He had this song called “Annie’s song”. And it was a song dedicated to his wife.
Come let me love you, let me give my life to you,
let me drown in your laughter, let me die in your arms,
let me lay down beside you, let me always be with you.
Come let me love you, come love me again.
Coupled with his ‘touch the depths of your soul’ voice this became my favourite love song. So desperate and void of inhibitions that’s what love is. I once saw this somewhere:
Love means giving someone the power to hurt you but trusting they won’t.
All I’ve got to say is ditto.
And of course.
Ok seriously? Someone needs to read fashion 101. But hey, if the music’s good why not huh? Right. BEE GEES. God I loved them. Who couldn’t love 3 grown men with full length beards and let’s not forget, apparently full length hair too. Of course the fact that were men biologically didn’t stop them from reaching decibels only dolphins could hear. But the high pitched voices became an iconic part of my childhood. There was this one song “Melody Fair”
Who is the girl with the crying face looking at millions of signs?
You see I used to cry A LOT as a child. and my dad used to try and make me cheer up or something he’ll always play the song and point to me and sing in the highest pitch he could muster. But that’s the only line of the entire song I knew cause that’s the only one HE knew.
There were other randoms like air supply, kenny rogers, jimmy nelson, barry manilow, michael bolton, ABBA, rod stewart, lobo, chicago, frank sinatra, barbra streisand, michael card, steve green Diana Ross, beach boys WHAM!, george michael, lee davis, elton john and many more
Later came Queen, The beatles, Collin raye, Ella fitzgerld, Kenny G, Elvis, Cyndi Laupur just to name a few.
But the ones who stuck were these three they were the ones I listened to growing up. I realized they represented so much. I used to love it when my dad used to play it and I used to listen to it with him. It meant so much to me to be able to share something with him. I guess when the music died so did the connection. Hey that’s a song right? American Pie? The day the music died….
Right. So that’s that. I love the oldies cause they remind me of things. Its nostalgia baby. To you it might be westlife to me its this.
I don’t care if everything’ s a total mess for now.
I don’t care if I’m self destructive.
I don’t mind watching me fall apart.
I just don’t wanna waste time looking for that damn switch.
It doesn’t matter that its cheap.
It won’t bother me that I’m camped in the middle of the road with a never ending supply of stuff.
I just want things to be the way they are.
It just doesn’t matter that there’s a gnawing pain so far inside cause nothing anyone says can reach it. Nothing.
I got my ears pierced.
Finally. I did 3 one shot cause I knew I’d be too chicken to go back. The fact is I was expecting to hurt like hell but it didn’t at all. Its like less painful than gettin a paper cut-really. But the burning doesn’t go away so its hard to sleep at night and it gets a bit annoying but all in all I’m glad I did it. Gives me a distraction. Ok, so my parents knowing would be good. But I don’t wanna wait till I’m old cause then I won’t want it anymore. Sucks. Just hope they don’t find out anytime soon. OHMYGOD. What if they google my name and the blog comes out?
Exams are FINALLY over feels DAMN great really. Have no idea why considering that its not like I’ve been studying my butt off or something like that. Have scheduled a million things to do. Catch up sessions, dinners, back to back gilmore girls watching, wallowing, CHERRY GARCIA, watching nigella at jah’s along with fun questions from her father like ‘do you know kannanraj’? I swear that family is a living comedy. Feel so relieved that finally, everything is over. Of course I still have promos and OH A levels. GOODY.
Last paper was paper 3, lit. The poem was about the “Boy at the window”. It was a fairly easy poem but what really struck me was that I felt connected to it. I felt dareIsay almost enlightened by the poem and what I thought it depicted about life in general. The P&P section was totally crap really. I maintain my stand on the fact that even though Austen is a great writer and her use of language is witty and rather ironic it is such a DITZY book book about love and money and meeting men and what not.
Tamil oral was today. Its the last day I’m going to speak tamil in my life ever. Seriously. The guy asked me what fruits were in season and I was like how the hell am I supposed to know so. So I told him I just went to Thailand and I saw a lot of mangoes so they must be it. Then I started seriously craving for mangoes so I said mangoes are really yummy and I love to eat them esp. in mango cake. Then he laughed and he was like okok you can go, Indians from India are weird, esp those that come to be oral examiners.
